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My Path

Every path has a journey. Often the path carved is not seen by everyone
but if it motivates others to be more, then it is a good path.
I hope mine inspires at least one heart.

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When I first started posting my work on Instagram, I started out as Poetessisms. I later changed it to Reena Doss Writer before finally claiming my dream as Reena Doss Author. Before publically posting, for nearly two decades I had writing and sketching sporadically without any consistency. It was not because I had creator’s block but because I was too busy working and considered my creative gifts to be a hobby because I believed people when they told me that it wasn't practical. Prior to my 15th year, writing, sketching and entertaining loved ones with storytelling, organizing skits or bringing something light-hearted was what I did because it not only gave me something creative to do but it also made others around me happy. From the time I could remember till I was in my pre-teens, my parents' would read, sing and encourage my artistic talents which helped me believe in the possibilities of my dreams. And that is why as I grew, my favorite passtime back then was to regale tales by candlelight or with dolls to my younger sisters and cousins because I took great pleasure in their excitement and reactions.

 

However, after a series of ups and downs, setbacks and transformative curves, I learned that who I wanted to be versus who I was being asked to be were two different things. I already knew that choosing my dreams would come at a high cost and it was not something I was ready for because I did not want to disappoint anyone that leaned on me. But my beloved Weaver was not going to accept that. Immediately, he set me on my path of destiny where every road only served to lead me closer to my dreams. It was not an easy path because after every road, I found myself dying to become something new. But it was only at the end of 2017, that something in me gave myself permission to break open and how glad I am that I did.

 

Little did I know that from 2013, the Weaver had already begun training me into slipping into the skin of the person I authentically was. I learned to be assertive in my journey, to say No to stories that tried to force me to be what I was not, to find the courage to do take paths that was unusual. And suddenly, in January of 2018, I wasn't able to stop writing, painting or creating every single day till date. It started with writing five pieces of poetry that were so different in nature, it really surprised me. I hadn’t yet realized back then that I was a poet nor did I take any of my writings or art seriously as I myself had no confidence in my work at this time. I remember sending them immediately to my best friend, Shruti Sharma to read. She had already created her poetry account @poetscapes in August (which was completely different from her photography account @shrutiscapes) as an Instagram poet by this time. A month later, she finally succeeded in getting me to join for which I will always be thankful to her for. So on the 1st of September in that same year in 2018, I joined Instagram. After that, the rest—as most of my instafamily know—became the foundation for the history in which I stepped into the truth of who I actually was. It also cost me everything in my old life, including many people I thought would be there for me which definitely goes to prove that the Weaver is about to take me into a new life journey and He just needed me to know who was with me, who I needed to keep at a distance, who I could reach out to and who deserved my energy, explanations and sharing in my excitement.

 

Even though I was ready to showcase my work, I still had to go through the process of letting go of a lot of habits, debris and patterns I had grown used to living with. Looking back, I can see that how many people, events and circumstances became the most significant catalysts that my beloved Weaver sent to create within me a sense of direction where nostalgia, lessons, adventure, travel, memory, hope and bravery transformed into the routes I needed to navigate the deep currents and move towards new shores. By stepping into the ocean of faith where the unknown has always awaited me on the other side, I was ready to embrace my destiny and my roots were right there to shine a light into my past. Friends that joined here—especially the LOML, Miriam @miriamo77, Ismet @shespeaksyoursilence, Suzana @suzana_k_poetry, Meg @chasingmagpies, Simple Things @thesimplethings and of course, my steady best ones (Shruti Sharma and Mrinalini Aryan)—were waiting to remind me of what I wanted to be as a little girl as well as to help me transition, prepare and move towards all my greatest dreams. Adversity also sent many old and new people to betray, mold and open the pieces of my heart where all I could do was develop, heal and grow into a better version.

 

To the ones who have travelled with me for a reason, a season and for a long period of time until life stepped in to ask you to take a different route—thank you for walking with me until we grew apart or changed our minds about who we wanted to keep in our close circle. There are no hard feelings for the sometimes inexplicable way things end because I know the beauty of beginnings begins with transformation, healing and growth and I have the most beautiful memories I chose to keep to remember you by. For those who have choosen to be a part of my lifetime worth of memories, who even if busy chose to keep in touch and made the effort to keep in touch—a thank you is not measurable to express the warmth I feel when I think of you because I know I can message you at any time and know it will bring a smile to your face and be welcomed without hesitation. To the ones that walk by my side daily through everything you've let me be a part of and all I have been through—the gratitude, love and happiness I feel knowing I can count on you consistently is a priceless gift that Kings and Queens have searched for but never found.

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I am very grateful for everything—the dreams that broke apart to build themselves back with much needed substance, the messy scars that I never expected to become the stories I dip into for my craft and the people in my story who did not let go of me as I set forth on this path. It is why I want to highlight their existence by appreciating them for being the main points in my chapters because I needed them on my best and worst days to ignite the flaming fire of my rising Phoenix. And because they contributed to my creative evolution, they will be the ones I will always remember because they put me on the path that led to the ones who needed my ink, read my stories and made me visible to the world.

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